Home

I wrestled back and forth.  Should I stay in Beijing or go back to the U.S.  Some days in the midst of this decision, I found myself struggle.  You see home is not the place.  It's heart. It's love.  I have friends and family back in the U.S. that I love and so that's home.  But somewhere in the two years of putting roots down in Beijing, I fell in love with people here too.  So the past two years this has been home.  How do you decide which home is better?  Or I guess not even better but just the right home for the time to come.  Hence my struggle.

Well, the decision has been made.  June 18th I am flying back home....for good.  Well, I guess I shouldn't say "for good" as I've learned nothing is permanent.  So for the time being, I'm moving back.  My mom's health isn't good so I need to be closer to her.  I need to support her and my brother.  So I think the plan will be a) I move back to WI and pray for a job close to my mom's home or b) find a job and help my mom and brother relocate to where I'll be.  I don't know what doors will open but the anticipation of what God will do is VERY exciting.  I wait...  Sometimes not patiently but I wait nonetheless.

I can't describe to you the thoughts that I'm having.  I'm very excited to go back and at the same time, sad about leaving.  I've grown here.  You've grown there.  I've changed and so have you.  Or to use a different analogy, the puzzle is no longer the same.  There's a piece missing.  I'm that piece, but I have no idea what shape I'll need to be in order to fit.  :) So finding my way around this  different home will be difficult and good all at the same time.  Please be patient with me as I re-acclimate to this new puzzle. Ruth said to her mother in law, where you go, I'll go.  Where you stay, I will stay.  Your people will be my people and your God, my God. Ruth was faithful to Naomi, and through this journey, my prayer is that I continue to put my faith, hope, and trust in God.  Where I go, God is there.  No fear can uproot this truth.  No lie can reverse the truth of who I am in Christ.  So, I'm coming home bringing with me all the love, truth, faith, hope, knowledge, perseverance, and material stuff that I have accumulated for the past two years.  Hmmm...  1 piece of luggage under 50 pounds won't be enough to contain it all.